Pedophiles suck… and Twilight too

Posted: 20th October 2011 by admin in People
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Pedophiles suck… and Twilight too

Psychiatric disorder or not, pedophilia and pedophiles suck. For those still living under a rock, pedophilia is a type of sexual deviation wherein an adult creep fantasizes and/or engages in sexual acts with prepubescent children.

How to spot a pedophile:

  • They seem to look like normal people, but they usually sport a pedosmile; something that looks like this:

These pedophiles suck and how about that? They’re both sporting the pedosmile! Elby Jessie Hars (left) is a convicted child sex offender and is still at large. Weldon Marc Gilbert (right) is on trial for raping multitude of young boys and producing child pornography.

  • Pedophiles tend to show unusual interest in children and are usually generous in giving treats or gifts. They also lurk in places full of children, ready to bait innocent kids with candies and stuff.

  • They sparkle.

I am kidding about this part, obviously. But has anyone ever noticed how author of “Twilight”, Stephenie Meyer, seem to hint pedophilia in her books? First is Edward Cullen, a 100-something year old vampire having a relationship with a 17 year old girl. And then there’s Jacob Black, a pedophile waiting to happen. Holy crap, Stephenie Meyer! What is wrong with you?! If pedophiles suck, then does that mean Edward and Jacob suck too? Twilight does, that’s for damn sure.

If you have the misfortune to encounter a pedophile, now is the time to test what you’ve learned from that self-defense class. If you don’t have Bruce Lee abilities, call the authorities or take your cue from this kick ass mom:

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